He's Just Not That Into You

Being a single, sassy twenty something, I have had my fair share of dating and relationships. Yes, I have read (and agree) with the books "He's Just Not That Into You" and "It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken," and I am not one who cries over spilled perfume or gets attached easily. If it's not going to happen, whatever, I'll move on. Next!

The thing about relationships - and this is what bothers me the most - that it is the MAN that determines whether or not a relationship will go anywhere. I have experienced this time and time again, and the most annoying thing about it is that as a woman, it's frustrating. I don't like not having the full control over something. And generally, in the case of being rejected, I don't feel bad because I was totally into the guy... I feel bad because it was completely out of my hands!

Yeah, yeah, you say.... whatever, Deana. You're wrong. But think about it... it's true.

Guys will decided within the first few dates what category you fall into. Whether it be girlfriend material, or casual plaything. And, guys, like pets, lose interest in things rather easily... and if they lose interest for a second - they're done, and move on to the next. And, of course, for men, the NEXT thing is seriously waiting around the corner.

But of course, I say this not bitterly, but rather educatedly. I think if you date knowing this, you'll save yourself from a lot of heartache. Girls shouldn't take "rejection" personally. In fact, as I mentioned before, it's not really about the girl - it's about the guy.

So if a guy is ready for a relationship, and he wants one with you... he'll let you know. And you'll know. But if he's not ready, or doesn't feel it, he'll let you know that, too. Now the way you figure it out tells you a lot about the type of guy he is (generally, if you don't hear from them in awhile, it's not going to happen... but it's the waiting that is a pain, because as women, we tend to want to believe the best in people and the situation, and will come up with all sorts of excuses in our minds about why we haven't heard from them... when the cold hard truth is because he's over it!). And if he jerks you around, then we can call my cousin Milosh and he'll take care of it.

Anywhoo... I hear DoucheBag Island is filling up fast, so ladies, if you have a guy who needs a house there, you better get rid of him quick before he misses the boat there. And if that makes no sense to you... listen to your gut feeling about all things. Even the littlest inkling that it's not going to work out is usually a sign that you need to move on, and for once, be able to head him off at the pass before you're the one waiting by the phone wondering what's up.